Don't mess with an old woman

In readiness for recycling a bunch of old, backup CDs, I'm reviewing files on them. Included in those files are copies email correspondence from 2004-2005, during the months following my retirement from The Little Airplane Company. Those emails are to/from 10-20 of the people with whom I had worked.

I can't help sharing one of the sillier ones that I had received.

                                  

An old woman (OW) gets pulled over by a traffic officer for speeding...

OW: Is there a problem, Officer?

Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.

OW: Oh, I see.

Officer: May I see your license, please?

OW: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.

Officer: You don't have one?

OW: No. I lost it four years ago - for drunk driving.

Officer: I see. May I see your vehicle registration papers, please?

OW: I'm sorry. I can't show them to you.

Officer: Why not?

OW: I stole this car - and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Officer: You what?!

OW: The body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see them!

The traffic officer looks at the woman...slowly backs away to his car...calls for back up. Within minutes, five police cars circle the car. A senior officer (SO) slowly approaches the car, clasping his half-drawn gun.

SO: Ma'am, would you step out of your vehicle please?

The woman steps out of her vehicle.

OW: Is there a problem, Sir?

SO: The traffic officer tells me that you said you had stolen this car and murdered the owner.

OW: Me? Murdered the owner?

SO: Yes, Ma'am. Would you please open the trunk of your car?

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

SO: Is this your car, Ma'am?

OW: It is.

Reaching into her car's glove compartment, the woman produces registration papers.

OW: Here are the registration papers.

The officer is stunned.

SO: The traffic officer tells me that you have no driver's license.

The woman digs into her handbag, pulls her driver's license out, and hands it to the senior officer. The senior officer examines the license, looking quite puzzled.

SO: Thank you, Ma'am. The traffic officer told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner. Why would he tell me that?

OW: I don't know. Hmm...I'll bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.

Don't mess with an old woman!

 

Comments

[Liz Hinds]

You can't get the better of an old woman!